Walls of Granite
by bridgestocross
Summary: An Annie/Auggie story that takes place post 5.10. Annie and Auggie decide to confront their feelings once and for all, but when two people are so good at building walls, sometimes it's impossible to take them down. Multi-chapter. Strong content at times. COMPLETE.
1. Chapter 1

_**Takes place after 5.10. Annie goes to the one place she feels safe. This will be a multi-chapter fic. I'm using 5.10 as a jumping off point, but will deviate heavily from the direction the show is currently taking. Enjoy and review (if you want!)**_

Annie walked down Auggie's street, which was currently bathed in lamplight. Nearing midnight, the sidewalk was almost empty. The sound of her boot heels clicked against the wet pavement. She looked up and into his window. Darkness. Well, that didn't necessarily mean anything. She wanted desperately to go up there and shake him. There was so much to say, yet the words never seemed to come.

Now, she stopped and leaned against the brick façade of a building directly across the street from his. The falling rain reminded her of that night in Paris when he'd been so angry with her. He'd accused her of not trusting him and caring more about the mission than their friendship. How could he think that? Annie closed her eyes and fought the tidal wave of emotion. He was the reason she came back at all.

She felt her phone vibrate in her pocket and smiled as she saw 'Mingus' come up on the display. She answered immediately.

"Hey."

"I didn't wake you, did I?" His baritone voice vibrated in her ear.

"No. I'm up."

"I, um, I wanted to apologize to you…for earlier."

Annie closed her eyes. "You don't owe me—"

"Yeah, I do. I accused you of lying to me."

"But you were right, Auggie. I did. Or at least, I lied by omission."

He was silent for such a long time that Annie quickly glanced at her phone to make sure the connection wasn't lost. "I did that to you last year. I kept so many secrets."

"It's the job." She responded.

"Is it?"

"Auggie, what are you saying?"

"I don't remember anymore what I was like before."

"Before?"

"Before the CIA. I was sitting here trying to remember the first time I lied to someone I cared about."

"I'm sure you were trying to protect them."

"There's protection, and then there's building a wall."

Annie felt a tear track down her cheek. "I know what you mean."

"Walker."

Annie smiled at his use of her nickname. Since she'd been back, he'd rarely used it. So much had changed. They'd become virtual strangers overnight, it seemed.

"Yeah?"

"I miss you."

She felt another tear break free. "Me too."

"So, what do we do about this?"

She could hear the smile in his voice and she smiled reflexively. "I don't know."

"Are you home…or are you at McQuaid's?"

"No." She swallowed hard thinking of Ryan in the hospital. "I'm…I'm out."

"Do you want to come over? I have a six pack in the fridge."

"Sure." She smiled as she listened to him disconnect the call. He never did say goodbye.

She waited about ten minutes and then quickly crossed the street and entered his building. She walked down his hallway and toward his door. Each step forward seemed to carry with it a specific memory. There were a few good ones, like the time she'd returned from Columbia and given him back his shirt in the doorway. She felt her cheeks heat at the memory. But there'd been so many bad ones too. The time she'd been running from the FBI…or the time she'd delivered the news that Helen was dead.

Annie shook her head. Things between them would always be complicated.

As she neared his door, it opened and standing in the soft light, was Auggie dressed in a faded blue t-shirt and worn denim jeans with a big hole in the knee. He pushed the door opened and leaned against the jamb as she entered. She watched him cock his head, listening.

"Still wearing the high heels?"

"Yeah, I haven't been home yet to change."

Auggie closed the door quietly and pushed the button on the light switch to brighten the space.

"You don't have to turn the lights on. I like it dark."

She watched his mouth twitch as he fought a smile and returned them to relative darkness with only soft light coming from various pieces of electronic equipment and the glow of the streetlamps outside.

"Okay." He answered.

She'd expected one of his trademark blind jokes, but instead he thrust his hands in his pockets and waited.

He barely had time to brace himself when he heard her heels rapidly approaching him. Alarm raced through him first, but was quickly replaced when he heard the soft sigh escape her lips. Just in time, he pulled his hands out of his pockets as her arms wrapped tightly around his neck.

They stayed like that for a long time. Annie seemed to be holding on for dear life as Auggie stroked her hair repeatedly. They'd entered a sacred space; each of them. They took what each had to offer without embarrassment or judgment; comfort that only they could give to each other.

Finally, Annie pulled back and steadied herself. She watched his brown eyes, always so expressive, return to a shuttered state.

"Let me get you a beer." He moved to the kitchen and pulled two long neck bottles from the fridge. He twisted off the caps and handed one to her. She took it and sat down on the stool at the counter. They drank together for a several moments.

"I remember the last time you sat there." He said.

"Oh?"

"We were trying to crack the code to figure out what Henry was doing in the jungle."

"Yeah. I remember." She closed her eyes, wishing she could go back to that moment and change everything.

"Why did you hook up with McQuaid? I thought you said—"

"That I wanted to concentrate on the work?"

"Yeah."

Annie slowly began to unpeel the label from her beer bottle. "I was lonely."

Auggie raised an eyebrow. "You were lonely and he was a warm body?"

If she hadn't been so in tuned with him, she might have been offended. Instead, she saw beyond the quip to the real question: Did she love McQuaid?

"I was so tired of being alone, Auggie. I came back here and I said…_that_ to you, but I didn't expect—"

"What? You didn't expect what?"

"You seemed so 'fine' with everything. You were just as plugged in to your life as you'd always been. You had the job, your judo, and plenty of women. I had nothing."

Auggie felt his defenses rise, but forced them back down. Maybe he needed to hear this. Maybe he needed to realize that while he was licking his wounds at being rejected by her, she was just as hurt.

"Why Eyal?"

"I told you—I didn't want to drag you in—"

"That's not the real reason. And for the record, when you told me that you went to him instead of me, it hurt like hell, Annie."

"I'm sorry." She whispered.

"Why?" His voice softened now. "Why didn't you come to me?"

"Because it would've been the end." She said softly.

"The end?"

"You said you would've kept my secret, but I don't know if that's actually true."

"Annie—"

"Wait. I was someone you loved then. Would you really have let me keep working in the field if you'd known?"

The use of the past tense was not lost on him. He swallowed hard. "I kept your secret even after I knew."

"Well, that's all relative, isn't it?"

"What do you mean?"

"You kept it, but you've brought it up at least three times now."

"Are you saying it's my fault Hayley Price went after you?" He asked, incredulous.

"Directly? No. Indirectly, hell yeah."

Auggie felt his temper flaring. "She would've found out either way."

"Maybe, but I think she dug a little harder than she needed to after you dumped her."

Auggie stopped himself from responding. They were getting seriously sidetracked and he was beginning to wonder if that was her intention. He took a long pull from his beer and placed it down carefully on the countertop.

"Annie, I think you would've arrived at this point sooner or later anyway. You can't keep working in the field with this type of medical problem."

She pushed up off the stool and walked to the window. The rain was coming down harder now and against the yellow light of the streetlamps it looked like fireflies. She turned to look at him. He was facing the exact location where she stood.

"I'm sorry. I didn't mean to bring this up again." He said with a wave of his hand.

"It's okay." She answered softly as she turned again to face the window. She closed her eyes and listened to the sounds of his steps as he came to stand behind her. She felt his hand touch her back and then move up until he had placed a hand on each of her shoulders.

"You're thinner." He said as he moved his hands down her back and to her waist.

"Not really."

"A little."

"I don't always have time for three squares a day." She tried to make a joke out of it, but he didn't smile. "I'm okay, Auggie."

"Are you?"

The concern in his voice was evident, but still, she did not crack. She was afraid to let him in again. He'd all but disappeared on her when she'd needed him the most. Granted, she hadn't contacted him to let him know how much she needed him, but still…

"I knew you weren't dead."

That brought her head up fast. "What?"

"I'd know it if you were dead. I know I'd feel it."

"Auggie—"

"I knew you were alive…out there somewhere, but obviously you didn't want me to know."

She turned now so that she could face him. He removed his hands from her body and crossed his arms over his chest.

"I wish I had." She said it and felt the weight of that confession lift off of her. "I made the wrong decision, Auggie. I let go of the only person that tethered me and I didn't know how to find my way back."

Auggie's mind momentarily flashed to Parker and her use of the word 'tethered.' Of course, she'd used it much differently. Parker had said they were floating in a bubble, not tethered to anything. Now, he was hearing it again, except Annie was saying that he'd been her tether. He shook his head to clear his mind.

"I'd been alone so long, Auggie. On the run, away from you…"

Auggie felt a surge of guilt immediately. She'd come in from the cold…to what? He treated her like a girlfriend that had broken his heart instead of an agent coming off a long term dark mission that needed serious deprogramming. What had he done?

"What should we do?" He asked. For the first time in a long time, he had no idea how to fix this.

"I don't know."

"Do you…" he swallowed hard, afraid to ask her the question he needed to ask, but more afraid of living his whole life without ever really knowing the truth. "Do you want to go back?"

"To before, you mean?"

"Yeah."

"Do you?" She said softly, afraid to look up and meet his intense gaze.

He didn't speak, but instead moved his head slightly to the side in a gesture that she'd been so familiar with, so long ago. Back then, before everything became murky, they'd had such a shorthand. A squeeze here, a touch there. A single nod of his head or a hand brushed along a sleeve…

She was about to ask him again when he let his fingers find her arms and trailed them up to the sides of her head. Again, he tilted his head, but this time, he moved closer still, until his lips touched hers. Here was her answer. A simple kiss that unraveled time and space and hurt and despair. She was lost and she was found again all in the span of one simple kiss.

He'd been kidding himself. He'd been a fool. Auggie had tried to replace the weeping hole in his heart with Hayley and then Natasha. They'd dulled the pain, but barely. He'd tried to convince himself that what he and Annie shared hadn't been real; it hadn't been love. He'd been a liar. It was all for self-preservation, but not anymore. For now, for tonight, he'd let down the walls and let himself tell the truth that had been burning in his heart all along.

"I love you."


	2. Chapter 2

_**A/N: Thank you so much for all your lovely reviews. I adore each and every one of them! As many of you have commented, there is a lot of baggage for Annie and Auggie deal with. The road won't be smooth—I give you fair warning—but I am team Walkerson, after all… enjoy!**_

_**This chapter contains a scene that is not appropriate for young readers. **_

_For now, for tonight, he'd let down the walls and let himself tell the truth that had been burning in his heart all along._

"_I love you."_

xXx

He could hear the quick intake of her breath and could feel her pulse beating at her temple. Time seemed to stop. The air felt charged, like atoms were circling around them, keeping them connected; keeping them whole.

Auggie was about to release his grip on her and step back when he felt her surge forward. He met her as they came crashing together in an overwhelming pulse of need.

Annie pulled him to her with a strong arm to the back of his neck. He countered her move by cradling her head and bending her back as he leaned forward. His other arm snaked around her waist and supported her weight. He was a drowning man and she was all the salvation he'd ever need.

She pulled at his t-shirt, letting her fingers drag across the hard terrain of his abdominal muscles. He pulled her back upright so that she could balance again on her own, but drew her in to him until his forehead touched hers.

"Are you sure, Annie?" He asked with eyes closed.

"I'm sure." She said with husky want clear in her voice.

He pulled back from her and felt the displacement of air as she bent down in front of him. The thud of her shoes hitting the floor sounded in his ears. Then she was upright again. Auggie reached out a hand and touched her arm in midair as she pulled her thin shirt up and over her head and then let it trail downward until he felt the soft lace of her bra. His palms grazed the sides of her breasts eliciting a breathy moan from her.

He felt heat ignite within him and a sudden and overwhelming desire to possess her. He could think of no other way to describe his feelings. Simply, she was the answer he'd always been looking for and now he wanted to possess her, body and soul.

With one fluid motion, he scooped her up into his arms as if she weighed nothing.

"Let's take this to the bedroom." He said.

She said nothing, but instead responded by kissing the column of his throat. It took all of his concentration to make it up the stairs and onto the bed. The minute he'd deposited her onto the mattress, he pulled her tightly to him once again and kissed her deeply.

At some point, the rest of their clothes had disappeared and now, he had the woman he'd dreamed of for months naked in his bed. He let his hands roam across her heated skin. Annie seemed to be doing the same to him; touching his now bare hip bones and tight muscles. The moved together, without speaking; each instinctively knowing how to satisfy the other.

Annie watched his dark silhouette move above her. She found herself touching him with a frenzied need. For so long, her fingers had itched to run through his soft hair, or slide along his sharp jawline. Now, she gave in to all her impulses. For tonight, there'd be no walls.

Auggie pulled her against his chest, feeling the soft swell of her breasts pressed against him. He moved her body to his side so that he wouldn't hurt her with his body weight. She countered his move by throwing her leg over his and then rolling on top of him. There she stayed as they came together. He'd gripped her hips tightly and pulled her to him. He felt her back arch and then the tickle of her long hair as she threw her head backwards.

Finally, with their bodies sated and their minds quiet, they drifted off to sleep. Auggie pulled her over to him and she curled herself into his side with her head on his shoulder. He turned his head and inhaled. She didn't smell like grapefruit anymore, but there was something else…an indescribable scent that was so distinctly _Annie_... he let himself savor it and her. For the moment, he relaxed. She was safe and she was here.

xXx

Hours later, Auggie awoke as Annie slept deeply on the pillow beside him. He carefully touched her hair and confirmed that it was longer than he remembered. He wondered what else had changed about her. Sometimes it seemed like nothing was different, and sometimes it was everything.

Auggie thought back to their angry encounter outside the hotel just yesterday. He'd been so angry with her, but why? Could it be as simple as jealousy? He'd known that she was getting involved with McQuaid, even though she'd denied it. It had definitely hurt, but he knew he had absolutely no reason to feel that way. She'd watched him go off with Hayley and then Natasha without a hint of jealousy. What was so different about Annie and McQuaid?

He felt her stir next to him.

"You're awake." She said with sleep coloring her voice.

"Yeah."

"What's the matter?" She said as she sat up now and tucked the sheet around herself.

"Nothing."

She was quiet for a long moment. "I should go."

"What? No." He reached out and felt her back as she slid out of bed. He sat up and listened to her descend the stairs and grab her various items of clothing.

"Annie, you don't need to leave."

She stopped as she pulled her jacket on and looked at him. He sat in bed with the sheet pooled around his waist. He had one muscular arm draped across the back of the headboard. She walked back up the stairs to the loft and sat on the side of the bed.

"What's different, Auggie?" She said tiredly.

"What are you talking about?" He asked with anger building.

"You said you loved me."

"I do."

"What do you think love is?"

Auggie moved back over to his side of the bed and quickly donned his boxer-briefs. He stood and strode purposefully to his closet where he grabbed a pair of black sweatpants.

"I'm not in the mood for games, Annie." He said as he moved down the stairs and to the kitchen.

"Don't run from me."

The quiet command had him stopping and turning. "I'm not running."

"Don't you think we should talk about things?"

Auggie ran a frustrated hand through his hair. The absolute last thing he wanted to do was talk. Lately talking to Annie was like playing a game of chess and he didn't think he had the strength anymore.

He moved to the fridge and pulled out a bottle of water.

"Auggie?" She said as she crossed the living room and stood by the doorway.

"What do you want me to say?"

"I want you to say everything." She shrugged, hoping he'd understand.

"Last night was…" he stopped himself. No matter what happened now, he wouldn't tarnish the memories of them together. "I think I let myself forget."

"Forget?"

"That you're in the middle of a mission and that you and I are on opposite sides."

"Is that how you see us?"

Auggie slammed the water bottle down onto the counter. "What exactly has changed, Walker? You're still on your way to McQuaid's bedside. I'm still going to work at the DPD tomorrow. We're still tracking down whoever is responsible for Chicago."

Annie flinched at his tone. She tried to steady her nerves and dig deeper. There was so much for them to mine through, but they were both so good at throwing up road blocks. She watched him carefully. He stood still as a statue in his kitchen, shirtless with only his black sweats on. His hands gripped the counter and she could clearly see the tension in his arms, even in the dim light of dawn.

She walked slowly toward him and watched him turn her head to track her movements. Annie reached out and covered his hand with her own. He didn't move to grip her hand, but he didn't push her away either.

"Auggie, don't do this."

He closed his eyes. She was trying. He had to give her that much. So why couldn't he let her in? Whatever had happened between them last night already felt like a distant memory and now he'd positioned them once again as adversaries.

The answer slithered through his belly like a vile, bitter serpent: Need. A word he'd come to loathe in all the days since he'd lost his sight. He didn't need anyone. He'd made damn sure of that. Well, emotionally at least. Physically, he still needed help occasionally and he'd learned long ago to release the feelings of humiliation and dependency that accompanied such occasions. He'd put helpful people in the same category as his cane or his braille keyboard. They were aids. No different than a pair of glasses or a hearing aid. He used them.

Emotional need was a different story. Somewhere along the way, he'd likened it to weakness and even now with Annie Walker standing in front of him with her heart partially exposed, he still couldn't reach out to her. He loved her. He'd given up denying it. But he couldn't _need_ her…

"Auggie?"

"What did you expect Walker? That we'd fall into bed and then ride off into the sunset?"

Even as the words left his mouth, he regretted them. He braced himself for a slap, but none came. No, that wasn't Annie's style. She wasn't all heat and temper like Tash. No, Annie was in a league of her own. He hadn't intended to hurt her. In fact, he was trying to do the opposite. He was trying to save face, for the both of them. The truth was, in the harsh light of day, there really was nowhere for this to go.

"I guess it was my mistake. I thought we'd come to some kind of understanding last night. I thought we were going to try again." She said quietly, but with steel in her voice.

Auggie bowed his head, knowing he'd chosen the coward's way out. It was easier to let her be angry with him then expose his soft underbelly and risk being annihilated by the one and only person that had such power.

Annie waited, but Auggie didn't move and didn't speak. She turned and walked to the doorway. As she was about to pull open the heavy metal door, his quiet voice startled her and compelled her to turn.

"Why didn't you contact me after Hong Kong?"

Annie took a breath, prepared to yet again defend her decision to go to Israel and see Eyal, but the look on Auggie's face stopped the words from ever leaving her mouth. She didn't know if she'd ever seen him look so vulnerable; so hurt.

"Four months, Annie. Four months."

"Auggie—"

"I don't understand why you wouldn't at least call—at least say you're okay."

"Because then you'd know!" She yelled.

Auggie felt the sting of her voice but was happy at least to have elicited some emotion out of her.

"About your heart? I already told you—"

"Not about my heart." She sputtered and turned, throwing her hands up in the air. Finally, she came to rest on one of his red chairs, dropping her head into her hands.

"Then what? I don't understand." He said as he followed the sounds of her shallow breathing. He knelt beside her and put his hand on her knee.

"You would've come, Auggie." She said tiredly. "You would've come for me and then you'd know I was a mess."

"Because of Henry." He said; voice hardening. He stood up and crossed his arms. "What happened Annie?"

"I just needed time. I didn't want you to see me like that. I needed to get my head clear. I never meant to stay away so long."

"Why didn't you want my help?" His voice still had a hard edge to it, but he couldn't check it. It burned in his gut that after all they'd been through with the Henry mess, when it was over, she hadn't come to him.

"I don't know…" She trailed off and stood up to pace. "I honestly don't know."

Well, that was the question, wasn't it, Auggie thought to himself as he paced back to the kitchen in search of his water bottle. At least it was out in the open now. The woman he'd loved didn't want his help when she was at one of the lowest points of her life. That was a hell of a thing.

"I've got to go." She said from the other side of the counter. He hadn't heard her move.

"Yeah. Okay."

"I'll talk to you later."

"Keep me updated on your mission."

"'Okay." She said softly as she slid the door open and stepped through.

Auggie waited until she'd shut the door again before he threw the plastic water bottle across the room with as much force as he could muster. He listened with satisfaction as he heard the last of the water glug out and onto the floor.


	3. Chapter 3

_**A/N: Sorry for the long delay. Hopefully I'll be able to keep up a faster pace! Enjoy!**_

Annie practically crawled up the stairs to her apartment. Between the motorcade explosion, Ryan lying near death in a hospital and her go-around with Auggie, she was totally and completely spent. Finally she turned the last corner in the stair well and dragged herself forward just in time to see Auggie leaning against the wall next to her door.

For a brief moment, she was transported back to Barcelona and the day they'd had that fight that had led him to go off by himself. He'd been pissed at her, and maybe she'd deserved it—a little. He'd been correct in that she'd been overprotective, but she'd covered with a line about how losing Jai had caused her to feel that way. Of course, she knew that deep down, there was more. Seeing him lying on the stair landing outside the hotel, yelling in frustration, had rattled her—badly.

When he'd accused her of treating him as if he were a burden, it had shocked her. Later, when she was alone, she'd really examined her feelings regarding that mission. Had she treated him differently? Well, he _was_ blind—there was no getting around that. Having Auggie as a partner meant compensating sometimes for his lack of sight. But, had she acted protectively _because_ he was blind? Honestly, she didn't think so.

Barcelona had been both a beginning and an end between the two of them. Things had changed on that mission; good and bad. They'd brokered a new kind of peace, yet that was also the beginning of a new chapter for them. The chapter of Things Not Spoken. Secrets had been kept and feelings had been hidden.

Now, she moved forward and watched him come aware. His body tensed and his grip on his cane tightened.

"Auggie."

"I'm sorry to show up like this…" he trailed off.

"Is everything okay?" She said as she stepped to the door and unlocked it. She touched his arm and felt him slide his hand to her elbow.

"Yeah. I haven't heard from you since last week…" he stopped when she stopped. He felt her remove his hand from her arm and put in on a table.

"I know." She moved to cabinet next to the fridge and pulled out a cheap bottle of cabernet.

Auggie hated that quiet tone she'd adopted with him. She was so secretive now and he hated it. Obviously they were two people used to keeping things close to the vest, but she seemed to have a way of letting him know she was lying to him without coming right out and saying it. He listened as she moved around the small kitchen.

"I know about Istanbul."

She closed her eyes and sighed. Of course he knew. He knew everything. Hell, he'd probably been the one that purchased her airline ticket.

"Here. There are two chairs at the table. I poured us some wine. Let's sit." She moved his hand to the back of the chair on his left. He stepped back to pull the chair out and bumped into something behind him. He turned and extended a hand, feeling the leather cover of the heavy bag. He didn't know what made him sadder; that she'd been doing the workout alone that they'd so often done together, or that she had a heavy bag in her kitchen.

"Sorry." She muttered as she moved his wine glass across the table until it bumped his hand.

"Interesting décor you've got there, Walker." He smirked, trying to hide the feeling of grief that swept through him.

"I never thought I'd hear that particular criticism from you, Auggie."

He laughed. "Touché."

She quieted as she sipped her wine and watched him. It was the second time lately she'd seen him out of his usual work attire. Tonight he'd opted for dark jeans and a gray thermal style shirt.

"So, what brings you here? And don't for a minute think I forgot that you said you didn't know where I lived."

She watched as he blushed a deep crimson; something she didn't think she'd ever seen before. Which probably meant he'd used a method to procure her address was most definitely not legal.

"What? Did you put a GPS tracker on me or something?"

"Or something…" he covered with a sip of his wine. He was still pissed as hell at Hayley Price, despite their truce, but it hadn't stopped him from hacking her trace on Annie's cell phone and finding out where she hung her hat these days.

"Getting back to my point." She blew out an exaggerated breath, letting him know that she'd forgiven him for his unscrupulous methods.

"The reason I'm on your doorstep at…" he checked his watch. "Eleven o'clock at night. Well, I wanted to talk to you and I came to realize after a week that you weren't going to come to me."

Annie put down her wine and waited. After the way they'd parted a week ago, she'd wondered what to expect, if anything.

"Anyway, I thought we should talk. I didn't like how we left things."

"Me neither." She responded. She hated fighting with him, especially since she thought they'd reached a tentative peace the night before. The distraction of work had been all consuming, however and she'd allowed the 'Auggie situation,' as she'd dubbed it, to float to the back burner for a while.

Of course, he'd already known exactly where her brain had gone. "I know you've got to stay focused on the mission right now. I don't want to distract you."

"Same goes for you. I know you're heavily involved too."

"Well, I'm not running point."

She watched a darkness move across his face. When Joan and Calder had clipped her wings, she'd absolutely hated it. Even the brief time chained to her desk had been torturous and watching other field agents run ops made her green with envy. She'd remembered Auggie's quip. _"Come on in. The water's fine."_ Had he meant that? No. Again, Barcelona had revealed the truth. He missed field work. He longed for it.

"I know the CIA is coordinating. Will you be my handler?"

"I don't know. I think Joan is sending another agent to piggy back your mission. I'll probably be involved one way or another."

"Okay."

"I'm here if you need me, Walker. That much will never change."

She instinctively reached out and covered his hand with hers. Again, they'd stumbled into safe territory. She pulled her hand back and watched him frown.

"Why are you here now, though?"

"I've been thinking about some things."

"Oh?"

"Yeah." He cleared his throat. "I think I'm the reason you didn't call me or contact me after Hong Kong."

"Auggie—"

"I've spent a lot of time blaming and criticizing you, but after last week, I think maybe it's my fault."

"It's not your fault—"

"You know, Hayley said something to me that I'm having a hard time figuring out."

"I can't wait to hear what the brilliant Miss Price has come up with this time."

Auggie smirked and held up his hands. "Okay, she's not exactly the safest topic. I get it."

"You're not the one she pointed a gun at."

Auggie smirk slipped off his face instantly. He hadn't known that. It seems Hayley had left that tidbit out when she'd come to apologize to him for thinking Annie was guilty. "What the hell was she thinking?"

"I don't know." Annie said as she swallowed the last of her wine. She looked over and saw the Auggie's was virtually untouched. "Do you want something else to drink?"

"Huh?" He moved his hand slowly across the table until he located the glass. "No, this is fine." He picked up the glass and drank.

"So?"

"Oh. Hayley, right." He couldn't remember what he'd been planning to say. Talking to Annie had become so difficult ever since she'd come back. The old camaraderie was gone. Beneath all the complicated and convoluted layers of their relationship, one truth remained. He missed his friend.

"Auggie?"

Auggie jerked his head back up. "Sorry."

"Are you okay?"

"You know what; I think the less said about Hayley, the better."

Annie snorted. "You'll get no argument from me."

Auggie smiled. "Do you think we would've worked out, Annie?"

Annie paused mid sip, totally stunned by his openness. She'd never really wondered that before. She'd always assumed that their work had interfered, but in a perfect world where they weren't getting shot at or accused of treason, maybe they still would've failed at a relationship.

"Honestly, I don't know." She pushed back from the table and walked to the window. She leaned on the sill and crossed her arms. "I don't exactly have a great track record."

Auggie smiled. "You don't?"

"I think people that are drawn to working for the CIA are good at keeping people at arm's length."

"What about you and me? Do we fall into that category?"

"I didn't think so…until that mess with Teo."

"Because I lied to you."

"No, and yes. I don't know. I know why you did it, it's just…"

"It's just what?"

"I think I realized then that I don't really know you—not really."

Auggie felt his head swim as memories of Parker breaking up with him came back with a punch. His first inclination was to refute her argument. In fact, he didn't know anyone at the agency that knew him better than Annie—not even Joan. But that didn't mean she really _knew_ him.

"So, what do we do about it now?"

"Auggie."

She sounded so tired. He hated hearing that in her voice. He stood up from the table and moved carefully toward her. He felt her hand reach out and touch his shoulder.

"What is it, Annie?" he said softly as he reached up and cradled her head. He felt her lean into his palm.

"I want you, Auggie. I want all of you." She whispered as she stared into his brown eyes, compelling him to understand.

"Annie—"

"I want to go back in time when you didn't lie to me and I didn't make a terrible choice to leave you." She rushed the words out before she lost her nerve.

Auggie closed his eyes, remembering for the millionth time the sound of the Calder's gun firing as he yelled her name. He knew she wasn't dead, but that was about all he knew. How could he tell her that those four months were a special kind of torture? How could he tell her that he didn't think he'd survive if anything happened to her? When it was all over, and she'd disappeared instead of coming home to him…well, it was a time he didn't like to think about—ever.

He opened his eyes. "Do you think we can ever trust each other again?"

"I trust you."

Auggie laughed bitterly. "You didn't even trust me enough to handle the mission with Natasha in Paris."

Annie blew out a frustrated breath. He was right; she didn't trust him to get the job done. But she'd been right too. When exactly _had_ he planned to get the thumb drive back to her-between orgasms?

"You were compromised—"

"And we're right back here again." He threw his hands up in the air as he stalked back to the table.

"You didn't need to sleep with her."

"Why the hell not?" He challenged; voice hard and eyes hot. "I wasn't exclusive with Hayley. The last time I was with Natasha she was jumping off a train in Canada in the middle of the night. I never thought I'd see her again!"

"Because we were in the middle of a time sensitive mission!" Annie fired back. "You were supposed to get the intel and get it back to me. That was the mission."

"There's the pot calling the kettle black." He retorted. "She wasn't just a mark, Annie. I wasn't just using her for the intel. I actually have feelings for her."

Annie saw red. Here she was, giving her life to the CIA; using every means at her disposal to get the job done in the interest of national security and Auggie was basically calling her a whore.

"You should go." She said; her voice as cold as ice.

"Annie. I didn't mean that you—"

"You should go." She said more softly.

Auggie recognized the futility in continuing their argument. He hadn't meant to go down that path. He didn't even mean it the way it'd come out. He considered Annie a patriot, above all else. He knew she'd had to use her body on occasion, but he'd done the very same thing when he'd been a field agent.

He hadn't meant to say it and he sure as hell hadn't even been thinking it, but there it was—again. As he gathered his cane and made his way to the door, he thought darkly that Freud would have a field day with the two of them.

"I'm sorry." He said as he put his hand on the doorknob and pulled it open. "I didn't mean that."

"It's fine. Let's just leave it." She said.

Auggie nodded once and made his way out the door and down the hall.

Annie turned back to the window and stared at the moon, willing herself not to cry. She'd just kicked the man she loved more than anyone out of her apartment. They couldn't seem to stop hurting each other.

Maybe some things were simply too hard. Maybe there'd be no happily ever after for them. Annie gave up her attempts to keep the tears away. She felt them rolling down her cheeks; unchecked. At least she was a silent crier. It was a skill she acquired in childhood when her parents would have their nightly screaming matches. She and Danielle had learned that loud sobs only made them targets of their parents' anger, so they'd both learned to keep things in.

Now, as she turned off the lights and settled into her single bed, Annie wondered where Auggie had learned to keep his emotions under wraps. There was so much more to him than she'd been allowed to know. Would he ever let her in? Would she ever let him in? Tonight, it seemed hopeless. Tonight, she doubted they'd ever find their way back.


	4. Chapter 4

_**A/N: Thank you for sticking with me. This story is HEAVY and there is so much pain and hurt for Auggie and Annie to sift through. Sometimes it seems like it's too hard. The walls are too high and too thick. I deeply appreciate the kind reviews. They are my personal cheerleaders! Enjoy…**_

"Hey." Annie said as Auggie slid open the heavy metal door to his apartment.

"Hey." Auggie responded as he stepped aside to let her pass.

Annie moved forward a few steps and stopped. She turned and waited as Auggie closed the door.

"Thanks for coming." He said as he shoved his hands in his pockets.

"Sure." She answered softly.

Auggie didn't move and didn't speak. He waited. He wanted everything to be different. He didn't want to be standing here in this apartment with all of its ghosts. He wished he could whisk her away somewhere beautiful and romantic. He wished…

"What did you want?" She said.

Auggie jerked his head back toward her. How could he tell her everything in his heart? It always seemed to come easily to him when he was alone. Now, with Annie standing only a few feet away from him, he was totally and completely tongue-tied.

Annie watched a myriad of emotions cross over his face. One second, that stubborn jaw was locked tight, and the next, his face softened so much that she had the urge to go to him and run her fingers along the worry lines around his eyes.

He stepped forward.

She waited, curiously.

"Can you use your imagination for a second?" He smiled.

"Okay." She drew the word out; puzzled.

"I have things I need to say to you, Annie."

"Important things?"

He felt the air rush out of his chest as he listened to her echo his own words from so long ago back to him.

She stepped forward.

"It feels like the only time I can tell you how I really feel is when I'm alone or you're unconscious." He chuckled weakly.

"Well, I'm going back under the knife to get my heart valve replaced. Do you want to wait 'til then?"

"What?" He felt his own heart thud hard at the thought of her lying unconscious in a hospital—again.

"Don't worry. It's a common procedure."

"When?"

"After I get back from the mission."

"Okay."

"So."

"So."

"Why do I need my imagination?"

Auggie blushed and ducked his head. "I, ah…I want to talk to you. Now that I know you'll be back in the hospital, I'm considering waiting until then." He smiled.

Annie stepped forward again. She was now standing only an arm's length away from him. She could smell the scent of his soap. "Just tell me, Auggie." She said softly, finally giving in to her impulse and reaching out to touch his chest.

Auggie's hand immediately covered hers and held tight. Annie watched as he closed his eyes and inhaled.

"I don't want to let you go, Walker." He said as he opened his eyes.

Annie felt her pulse speed up. "Auggie—"she trailed off.

Auggie shrugged and released her hand. "I don't know how to do this. I want to be with you. And I want to go back and fix whatever's broken."

"How do you un-break trust?" She said as she felt a tear escape her eye and fall.

Auggie finally moved and stepped forward. His hand lifted and located her shoulder. His other hand moved to her other shoulder. "It was never trust, Annie. It was fear."

"I don't understand…"

"I pushed you away. I put roadblocks in our path. I did that. Me."

"Auggie—"

"Losing you scares the hell outta me, Annie."

"But, why did you…" She trailed off again; her thoughts a jumbled mess. "But—"

"Helen?"

"No. I understand about Helen. I don't blame you for that, Auggie." She touched his face and compelled him to hear her. "I never did. Those were extraordinary circumstances."

Auggie closed his eyes again, remembering the grief of reliving Helen's death. He didn't think anything would hurt more than losing her the first time. He'd been wrong.

"I still regret it. I want you to know that."

"Okay."

"Can we…do you want to get outta here?" He stepped back and returned his hands to his pockets.

Annie was suddenly charmed by the completely boyish grin on his face.

"Sure."

Auggie nodded and moved quickly to the credenza to retrieve his cane and keys. Annie noticed he did not pick up his cell phone. He left the cane folded up in his right hand and held out his left hand to her.

"Ready?" He asked.

"Ready." She answered as she touched his hand with the back of hers.

xXx

An hour later, they walked together through the National Mall. Annie marveled at the tourists. It was so blissfully normal. It was a perfect afternoon. The chill of fall had crept into September, but this day brought a strong remembrance of summer. School children were corralled in various groups heading to and fro, zigzagging across the expanse of space. Families on vacation were sprawled on the lawn enjoying picnics. A few people jogged along the paved paths.

"Are you okay?" Auggie asked as he squeezed her arm.

"It's so normal here." She answered, distracted by a laughing father faux-chasing his escapee toddler son. The man scooped up the child in strong arms and then easily placed the giggling child atop his shoulders.

"Yeah. I like it here."

Annie swung her gaze around to face Auggie.

"It feels far away from Langley, even though it's not. I like to be around the tourists checking out the monuments." He shrugged.

"I didn't think you ever liked to be away from Langley." She teased.

Auggie snorted and rolled his eyes. "Contrary to popular opinion, it's not my life."

"It's not?" She asked, seriously.

"No." He said as he slid his hand down from her upper arm and into her palm.

"What do you want, Auggie? Do you ever imagine a life after the CIA?" She asked as she pulled him to a stop. The sun was setting behind him and cast him into a brilliant light. She watched his strong profile as he turned his head and closed his eyes.

"I'm scared of leaving the CIA…I've worked hard to make myself valuable there…I don't know if that would translate any place else." He turned back to face her.

"Why would you think that? I can name a dozen private companies that would hire you in a heartbeat."

He shrugged. "I don't know. It's loyalty also. They took me back…after."

"You mean Joan took you back."

"Yeah."

"You're very loyal to her." Annie could hear the bitterness in her own voice.

"Annie—"

"I'm happy you have that with her, Auggie. I am. But she threw me under the bus."

"She didn't have a choice—"

"Oh really?"

"You hid your medical condition—"

"Do I have to keep reminding everybody how I came about having that medical condition?" She could feel her voice and pulse rising, but she couldn't stop it. "You were rewarded for your loyalty, Auggie. I was punished for it."

"She didn't kick you out. She transferred you."

"That was bullshit and you know it." She turned into the slight breeze, hoping it would cool her temper.

"Why was it bullshit?"

Annie turned back at his angry tone. "Because I still had valuable work to do—"

"You don't get it, Annie." He laughed bitterly. "You think you're above everyone else."

"What—"

"Do you honestly think Langley had no one else to send in that could finish your work? You're not that irreplaceable Annie."

She reared back as if his words had been a physical blow.

He breathed deeply in and out. What had he said? Why had he said that? He felt dizzy and sick.

"We're never going to get past it, are we?"

Auggie hated her detached tone. Damn it, he'd done that. He'd pushed too far.

"I didn't mean it like that, Annie."

"Oh? What exactly did you mean? Don't you think this agency owes me a little leeway? Have I ever compromised a mission?"

Auggie dropped his head and put his hands on his hips. He'd brought them here in order to leave work behind them. He'd hoped the gentle breeze and lazy summer temperatures would relax them. He was at the end of his patience. Maybe she was right. Maybe there was no 'getting past this.' Maybe some things were simply too hard.

"Forget it."

"What are you so afraid to tell me?"

Auggie swung his head back at her. He felt an equal mix of rage and love for this impossible woman that stood before him.

"I'm not afraid."

"What is it? Whatever it is, we're dancing right around it, aren't we?"

Auggie felt cold dread in his belly. He didn't want to continue this conversation. He was supposed to be leading, he was supposed to dictating the direction…she wasn't supposed to see it. No one was supposed to see the truth—not even him. Especially not him.


	5. Chapter 5

_**A/N: I'm going to wrap this up with one more chapter. This story has been about their emotional journey, and acknowledging deep wounds. Whether or not they have a future together is a difficult question that they both must answer. As always, I deeply thank you for your reviews. They keep the story moving. Enjoy!**_

_Auggie felt cold dread in his belly. He didn't want to continue this conversation. He was supposed to be leading, he was supposed to dictating the direction…she wasn't supposed to see it. No one was supposed to see the truth—not even him. Especially not him. _

"What's wrong?" Annie asked, alarmed by the sudden darkness that had crept onto his face.

Auggie released her arm and walked a few steps away from her, seeming to stare out at the capitol building.

Annie studied his form. His straight back and perfect posture spoke to his military experience. He was always so in control—even when things were out of control, he was the steady one…the brick building in the tornado that refused to yield. She had seen him crack so rarely and even then he always maintained a measure of control.

Now, she moved up and stood beside him. He turned slightly to face her, but did not attempt to direct his gaze in her direction.

"There are things I wish I could tell you. I've thought about it…so many times, Annie. I think that what I am now is a result of all those experiences—good and bad. I don't know if I can change."

"Change what? I'm not asking you to change."

"What happened to us last year, I regret it. You have to know that."

Annie was a stunned by his sincerity. "Me too, Auggie. I wish I had done things differently." She said thinking back to the fateful moment when she decided to go dark, despite his pleading to the contrary.

"But—and this is a big one—would we choose differently next time?"

Annie turned away from his and crossed her arms over her chest; chilled by the breeze.

"Can't we just be human, Auggie?" She said tiredly. "I don't know about you, but I'm not planning on ever putting myself in that kind of circumstance ever again."

Auggie reached out and pulled her close; wrapping his arm around her shoulders. "I know."

They stayed like that for a while, not speaking. Annie closed her eyes and let herself sink into the warmth of his arm around her. She'd missed this. She'd missed him. That was the simple truth of it.

"I love you." She said aloud. She'd been thinking it, and hadn't realized she'd said it aloud until he turned to her and held her gently by the hands.

"I love you too, Annie. I want this. I want us."

"Me too." She smiled as she moved into his embrace and hugged him tightly.

"Where do we go from here?" He said when she eventually stepped back.

"If I asked you to leave; to walk away, would you?" His mind flashed back to Tash asking him the exact same question. Then, his answer had been a firm 'no.' Of course there'd been a reason why he'd said no then. He hadn't understood it. It was just a feeling that had come over him—but now, the reason he'd not left with Tash was standing right in front of him.

"Yes."

Annie was undone. She'd never expected him to say that. He'd leave? The CIA?

"Auggie—"

"What about you Walker? Would you walk away?"

"From what? In case you hadn't noticed, I've already gotten the boot."

"That's not exactly true." He asked with one eyebrow quizzically raised.

"I was there, Auggie. I'm pretty sure I remember what happened."

"You were reassigned. Not kicked out."

"Same thing."

Auggie pulled his arm off of her shoulders and shoved them back into his pockets. He clearly heard the bitterness in her voice, but there was more to it. Something niggled at the back of his mind; something he'd pushed down for a long, long time.

"So you'd rather just walk away than man a desk." It hadn't been phrased as a question, because, of course, Auggie already knew the answer. He didn't know why he was pushing her to say it to him. It hurt him, yet he pushed anyway.

"I'm not cut out for it." She answered tiredly.

"Annie—"

"No. When you found out about my heart, you defended my wanting to stay in the field—you said it was my decision. Now you're doing a total one-eighty."

Auggie opened his cane and roughly swiped at the ground around him, ensuring it was clear. He felt like he couldn't breathe. He didn't want to finish this conversation and he sure as hell didn't want to know why on one hand he championed her cause, and on the other, he condemned her for her attitude toward desk duty.

Annie had always been something of a paradox to him: A fresh-faced beauty with a razor sharp mind and nerves of steel. She was a thoroughbred and he was trying to make her a stable pony—but why? He knew why…he'd always known why—for him. It gave him some sick sense of pleasure that she'd been knocked off the gameboard just like he'd been. They'd be even now. He wouldn't be the wizard behind the glass-walled office while she was the international woman of mystery.

Those thoughts galled him immediately and he hated himself for thinking them—even for a second…yet they remained.

"Auggie?"

"I just worry about you in the field." He answered lamely.

He heard her sigh; long and slow.

"You know you can't, right?"

"What? Worry about you?" He asked, incredulous.

"It colors your judgment."

Auggie was puzzled for only a split second when he realized what she was referring to: the Henry Wilcox mission and her decision to go dark.

"And were back to that? I thought you said you regretted it."

Annie flinched at his hard, detached tone. "You know what I regret? I regret hurting you. I regret putting Danielle through hell. But do I regret using the only means I had available to complete the mission? No."

Auggie nodded once. "We go around and around on that. By the way, my opinion of your actions had nothing to do with the fact that you were my girlfriend. I would've thought you'd give me a little more credit than that. I was playing this game when you were still taking your SATs."

Annie shook her head. No matter how they twisted and turned it, they remained on opposite sides of a very big gap.

"It's my decision."

"Look what it cost you, though."

"What about you, Auggie? Do you ever think about what it cost you?"

Auggie rubbed his eyes against the setting sun. It sometimes amused him that his eyes still responded to such stimuli even though his brain wasn't getting the messages anymore. Right now, of course, he was definitely less than amused.

"I don't want to talk about this."

"Why not? You don't seem to have a problem referencing my medical problems every chance you get."

Auggie smirked. Well, she had a point. He couldn't help it though. The thought of her running missions with a heart condition made his blood run cold.

"What do you want to know, Annie? What it's like to be blind? Are my other four senses magnified? How do I get around without falling? Why don't I have a guidedog?"

"Don't patronize me."

"Then what do you really want to know?"

Annie sucked in a breath. For a moment, she saw it—the real Auggie. Now that he'd opened the door, she really didn't know where to begin.

"I want to know if you're okay." She said simply.

She watched as his face softened. She wished she could put a voice to all the unanswered questions she had about him, but she was scared.

"I'm okay."

"I didn't know until Barcelona how much you wanted to be back in the field." She probed gently.

He closed his eyes briefly and thought back to their emotional conversation that day in the plaza. "Yeah."

"How do you handle it?"

"I don't know—the heavy bag. The occasional bar fight. Judo seems to be working for now."

"You're still angry."

"Aren't you?"

Annie looked down at her chest, even though the scar was covered by her white cotton t-shirt. "I wasn't until they used it as an excuse to keep me down."

"Don't you think you're a liability? I mean, I know I am." He laughed as he waved his fingers in front of his eyes.

"No." She said immediately. "I don't know. " She kicked at the gravel of the path. "I don't want someone to get hurt because I fell down on the job." She mumbled.

Auggie grabbed her arm immediately. "What happened?"

"I got into a scuffle and my injector pack got smashed to pieces. All twelve. I couldn't breathe—my heart was beating out of rhythm…" She trailed off remembering the panic that she'd felt as darkness had crept into the corners of her vision. "Ryan managed to salvage one of them."

Auggie said nothing.

"I know I put him in danger." She said quietly. "I know it."

"After your surgery, you might be cleared for field work again."

"Back at Langley? She asked skeptically.

"I don't know…maybe."

"And what about you?"

Auggie had hoped she wouldn't circle back around to this topic. "I'm fine, Walker."

"But—"

"Okay—here's the deal: Do I wish I could still be a field agent? Of course I do. Does it piss me off? Yes. But what can I do about it? I choose to get on with my life."

"If I go back to field work, wherever that may be, and you keep working in the DPD, are we just gonna be back here again in another year?"

"No." He said emphatically. "No. I want more with you, Annie. You're the one that said our lives outside the building should matter more, remember?"

"Yeah." She said as she slid her hand into his and felt his hand tighten around hers immediately.

She gently pulled him forward until they began walking again at a leisurely pace. The Mall was still bustling, but less so. The school groups had reloaded their buses homes. Now, more urban dwellers crisscrossed the vast space with cell phones at their ears and briefcases in their hands.

She looked over at his strong profile. There was still so much mystery sounding him, but she'd gotten a little piece of him today that she hadn't expected. For the first time in a long time, she had hope that they had a future together. It wasn't a done deal, but a spark of hope existed and for now that was enough.

She felt him slide his hand upward until it reached her upper arm in the more practical 'sighted guide' hold. This would be her life, she realized, and that was perfectly fine. The touch of his hands on her skin, whether as guide or lover, was like coming home. She knew it was his hands that she'd always wanted.

"I'm starving." He said.

"Me too." She murmured in agreement.

"Wanna hit that little Italian place?"

"The one with the amazing bread?"

"Yeah. I think I have it saved."

Annie slowed them to a stop and Auggie began searching through his phone. The man was nothing if not useful.

"Okay. Got it." He said as the Bluetooth in his ear gave him GPS directions.

"I can see why you don't need a guidedog."

He threw his head back and laughed deeply. "Gotta love modern technology."


	6. Chapter 6

The air up in the mountains was different. Quieter. Cleaner. Auggie closed his eyes and breathed deeply. He slowly opened his eyes and let the world back in again.

Shane, his instructor and guide was droning on and on about the waves off the coast of Oahu and how if Auggie ever wanted to come out there, he'd be right by his side. Auggie's stomach did a little flip at the thought of surfing—blind. It was unbelievable enough to him that he was skiing blind.

As the chairlift approached the top, Shane began counting down until Auggie's skis hit the snow.

"5, 4, 3, 2, 1."

Auggie stood up and let the momentum of the little hill carry him forward and then, while holding onto the end of Shane's ski pole, he moved off to the right.

"Dude. Are we ready or what?"

Auggie had been a bit worried at first by Shane's laid-back, surfer boy style, but after a few runs, it was clear that the man knew what he was doing. Shane, now forty five, going on twenty, was ski pro trained in adaptive skiing with many years of experience.

"Yeah, let's do it." Auggie shuffled forward until they had a bit of clearance and then they began to skate forward until they both stood at the top of the black diamond.

"I don't usually get to hit this slope, but I think you'll be okay."

Auggie bent down and ratcheted down his ski boots so they were tighter. Even though it had been years since the last time he'd put on skis, it all came back quickly. Now, he stood up and gave Shane the signal to begin.

With Shane leading the way, Auggie followed behind in his wake. Shane took long, slow turns as he traversed the width of the slope. Auggie loved the feeling of the wind in his face and the sound of his edges slicing through the snow. For only a moment, he wished fervently that he could really open up and let himself fly.

He'd wondered if skiing again would dredge up too many sad feelings, but so far, it wasn't too bad. He was at the top of the mountain in Whistler, British Columbia, skiing.

Shane's voice crackled in his earpiece. "Coming around to a stop in 5, 4, 3, 2, 1."

Auggie pulled up and slowed his speed as he neared the man.

"Tell me that wasn't a rush?" Shane said.

Auggie kept picturing a young Sean Penn. "That's was awesome."

"Good. What do you say we head down and check on that snow bunny wife of yours?"

Auggie laughed, thinking of Annie down on the beginner trail. Despite her multitude of skills and accomplishments, she'd never been skiing before. Thankfully, she was up for anything.

"Yeah man. Sounds like a plan."

xXx

"So Annie, what do you do while Aug-man here is plugged in to virtual reality?" Shane asked as he practically inhaled his meatball sub.

"I'm a translator." She said as she eagerly ate her ham and cheese on rye. Who knew skiing could make you so hungry? Of course, she wasn't sure how much actual 'skiing' she'd done. So far, she'd only mastered the snow plow, turning left and right (although left was a bit more problematic) and how to stop.

"Translator? Wow…that's cool." Shane bobbed his head in response. "What kind of things do you translate?"

"Whatever they need me for." She smiled. "Mostly I work for international types that need an interpreter."

"So, how many languages do you know?"

"About a dozen." Annie lied easily. She'd learned that anything more than that raised too many eyebrows.

"You must be a genius. I barely got through high school Spanish."

"But you're a professional skier. I don't think I could ever do that."

"If you stick with Augman, you'll learn quick. My man's got some skills."

"So I saw." Annie reached out and covered his hand where it rested on the table. "I never knew you had this hidden talent." She teased.

Auggie smiled and sat back as he and listened to Shane flirt harmlessly with his wife. He'd been a little perturbed when Shane had laid it on so thick at first, but soon enough, he realized the man was gay and just trying to charm his clientele.

"So, Dave and I are having an après ski thing tonight down at the base lodge. If you too wanna swing by, that'd be totally cool."

"Dave?" Annie asked.

"He's my boyfriend." Shane said.

"Oh. Um, yeah, sure. Sounds like fun."

"Cool. Listen, I'm gonna run to the instructor's room for a few. I'll be back and then I'm gonna take your dude somewhere I usually reserve for…"

"Sighted skiers?" Auggie deadpanned.

"Right? I know." Shane responded in his typical laid back fashion. Auggie was beginning to wonder if Shane was bothered by anything—ever.

Once they were alone, Annie pulled her chair closer to Auggie's and laid her hand on his arm. "He's a trip."

"Yeah. You could say that."

"He's good though, right?"

"He's all business once we're on skis. It's just the conversation on the lifts…" Auggie shook his head good naturedly.

"Are you glad we came here?"

Auggie turned to face her. He knew she didn't mean British Columbia, or Whistler Blackcomb. He knew she meant 'are you glad we left DC and started over.'

"I think so. What about you?"

"It's different. That's for sure." She laughed.

"What? The private sector? You're still running missions."

"I know. I didn't mean that—I mean us." She finished softly and had him raising an eyebrow.

"Us? In a good way?"

"In the best way." She said as she leaned in and kissed him chastely.

"After everything, I didn't actually think we'd make it." He dropped his head, suddenly overcome by the swell of emotion.

"I never doubted it." She said and watched as he picked his head up and made almost perfect eye contact with her.

xXx

A week later, with the escape of the snowy mountains behind them, Auggie and Annie returned to their lives back in the heart of Seattle where they'd been living ever since leaving Washington DC. Well, they'd made one detour on the way; a little wedding chapel in Vegas where they'd pledged themselves to each other; for better or worse.

Auggie's left hand still felt a little strange, even six months later, with the metal band around his finger, but he was happy enough to get used to it. As someone that had never particularly believed in marriage or the need to 'seal the deal' with a piece of paper, he'd surprised himself. There was definitely something different now. They'd said vows; important vows to each other in the presence of God—or in their case, in the presence of an Elvis impersonator. Either way, they'd been sacred and hallowed.

"It's raining." Annie said as she came up behind him and wrapped her arms around his neck as he sat at his desk, working.

"This is news? It's rained almost every day since we moved here."

"I know. I like the rain. It's just that it's _really_ raining."

Auggie pulled his headphones down around his neck and cocked his head; listening. "Huh." He responded as he heard the sound of raindrops pinging off the concrete outside.

"I was planning on running to the grocery store and the dry cleaner before work tomorrow. We've been gone for a week and there's no food in the house."

Auggie stood up and stretched his back. He walked to the window and listened as the wind battered their loft apartment.

"What do you say we leave the errands for another day and order take-out?"

"I'd say you are the smartest man I've ever met—as long as you mean take-out from Shanghai Garden?"

"Why is it always Chinese?" He laughed as he logged back onto his computer and automatically ordered her Vegetable Chow Mein.

"I don't know. I love their noodles." She shrugged. "Why? What else would you get?"

"I don't know. Pizza? Subs? Burgers?"

"Next time. I promise."

Auggie chuckled as he finished placing their order online. It was an unbelievably ordinary thing to do—eat take-out with your wife in front of the TV on a rainy Sunday afternoon. Six months ago, he could not have imagined he'd be living this life.

An hour later, with the Seahawks game on in the background, he and Annie set up the food on the coffee table in their open concept loft. At first, the concrete floor with the exposed brick walls had felt hollow and impersonal, but soon they'd purchased a mix of modern and eclectic pieces to fill the space. They'd mutually decided, without much discussion to sell all their old furniture before leaving DC.

Annie had told him about the mango colored couch with the espresso-stained coffee table and end tables. He wasn't sure about 'mango' but he figured a splash of color wouldn't kill him. Anyway, it seemed to be a good fit to Annie's personality. Whenever he tried to picture her, there was always sunlight and bright colors in the background. She'd always been light to him. Even from the first day they'd met.

"I have to be in at six o'clock tomorrow morning." She groaned as she pushed back her plate of food.

"Why so early?"

"Debrief." She said simply.

Auggie nodded. The impulse to push her was strong, but he fought it down. Annie still worked as a field agent, but for a private sector firm now. She still ran missions, and she still faced danger. He trusted her, but he had to admit, he slept better when she was safely beside him.

As for him, he'd stayed a faithful employee of the CIA, now operating out of their west coast offices. He was no longer a handler, but instead headed a division of hackers that tried to stay one step ahead of threats to the United States and its citizens. He missed the action and living vicariously through Annie, but there was a certain comradery among his small group.

"Well, this is technically the last night of our vacation. Let's enjoy it." He said as he held out his hand to her.

She quickly slid her hand into his and then pulled it to her lips and kissed it. She scooted over and then laid her head in his lap as the football game played in the background.

"Auggie?"

"Yeah?"

"Are you happy here?"

He'd been absently stroking her long hair and now he stopped abruptly. "Why?"

"I don't know." She said softly.

Auggie gently pushed her up so they were face to face. "Aren't you?"

"It just feels so final. Leaving DC…leaving the CIA. I don't know. I feel like I graduated, I guess."

Auggie smiled and reached out and touched the knee that he knew she had bent in front of her. "I guess you did."

"You know, I was never much of a planner. There wasn't much point. Army brat…new duty station every year or so…" she trailed off.

Auggie waited and listened. He'd learned long ago to give her time to puzzle out her feelings. She was a verbalizer—most of the time. His mind automatically flashed back to the terrible six months after she'd resurfaced where he could barely get her to string two sentences together. In was a dark place in his memory and he'd never felt so blind.

"I guess DC was the first place that really ever felt like 'home,' you know?"

"Well, your sister was there—"

"Yeah, but it was more than that." She laughed and touched his cheek. He turned his head and kissed the center of her palm and then playfully grabbed her arm and kissed the inside of her wrist. Annie felt her insides go weak as she watched him. She wondered if she'd ever take him for granted. She prayed she never would.

"I know, Walker." His deep voice rumbled as he leaned forward and kissed the side of her neck.

Annie closed her eyes and let herself float away in the sensations of the moment. She felt her hands reach out run through his hair; so thick, yet so soft. She pulled him back from where he was kissing his way up her collarbone and let her lips find his. She loved to kiss him. Auggie kissed fully and passionately. There was no pretense or shyness about it. He drank her in like a fine wine.

Somewhere along the way, she'd forgotten what she'd planned to say next. They'd been talking about happiness and their cross country move to Seattle…at least she thought that's where they'd left off. Somehow she was now horizontal on their beautiful mango couch with Auggie atop of her.

She wasn't a kid anymore. She was a full-fledged adult that had made hard, sometimes impossible decisions. She'd put her own well-being last more times than she could count. Now that she was finally free of it all, things were becoming clearer and she'd realized, with sudden and horrifying clarity, how close she'd come to losing the few precious things that really mattered.

As rose up to kiss her husband, Annie realized she was certain she'd made the right choice.

"I love you, Auggie." She whispered.

He pulled back from her for a moment; surprised by the tone of her voice. "I love you, too."

"I think…I know…we made the right choice." She watched the slight confusion on his face transform into her most favorite expression of his; the mischievous grin.

He bent down again and let his hand run along the exposed skin of her body. "Damn straight."

xXx

_**Thank you, dear readers, for hanging in there with me. I apologize profusely for the ridiculously long delay before this final chapter. In my defense…I wrote a novel! The idea became lodged in my brain and refused to go away until it was written. So…there's that. What I'll do with it…I have no idea. **_

_**As always, I am so grateful for your kind reviews. They are read with deep appreciation. **_


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